August 8th, 2023
I had anticipated this date from the start. Holding my breath and not sure what the future would hold. It has been better than I imagined.
Since I couldn't have a VBACK (due to Ryder being born prematurly, me going in for an emergency c-section, and being cut not only the typical horizontal way but vertically too, my doctor didn't want me straining those muscles or risk them getting too separated), I had a scheduled c-section. Kevin and I checked in at the glorious hour of 4:30 in the morning on August 8th. The nurses rubbed my belly with some steriliztion stuff that made me sooo itchy. We signed paperwork. And then came the dreaded IV sticks. Ugh. I ALWAYS want Kevin to just step in and do it. The nurses miss every time and have to try 3 or 4 times to get a good flow. It's a little torturous but i just sit and smile while Kevin just silently watches and bites his tongue. haha torture. But I lived and the positive this time: it was put in my right back forearm and not a hand vein!
I was feeling super anxious/nervous/excited at this point. Just knowing what all was going to go down and that it wasn't going to be crazy rushed (and yep still praying everything would go smoothly)! Kevin and I talked with the new resident (who was to be in on the surgery with Dr Codd) about her med school time. We love talking to everyone about this and everyone is so nice-haha they all know Kevin is in school and are so encouraging. And I guess by "we" i mean "me". Kevin is content to not have anyone know what we are doing or what he is up to!
We walked back to the OR room, I sat on the table while the anesthesiologist (Who was a Crapo/Had’s/Braxton’s cousin)put the spinal block in. He was super nice and talkative (they all were). Immediately felt tingling and numb in my toes and was shocked at how fast that started working. I honestly don't know why I was shocked. It's not like this was my first time. haha. I layed down on bed, got my catheter put in, felt pretty dang vulnerable and silly as they did that (UGH) and strapped my arms out to the side which I hated actually. They had warm blankets placed on me, but because of my nervs or something I was still just shaking/shivering like crazy.
Dr Codd and Dr. Nord (the resident we had talked with earlier) came in about now. We talked again about how everything would go. Then the curtain went up, Kevin got to come in (he was made to dress down and sit outside while they prepped me). The surgery began. I immediately felt nauseous, which I didn’t feel like when I had Ryder, so I was surprised and annoyed. But the anesthesiologist was ready and expecting it. Had me turn my head and throw up in a bowl thing. Just water/spit since I hadn’t eaten or drank anything since 10pm the night before. (TMI? Sorry guys) Once I got that out of the way (like 30 seconds) I felt better and was fine.
I mostly just remember watching Kevin’s face, who was watching the whole procedure 😂. They pulled her out at 7:03am. Kicking her legs a million miles a minute. Because of staffing issues(short), they passed her through the window to the NICU to have her cleaned off/weighed/measured and Dr Codd then took out the placenta, tied my tubes, and proceeded to clean me up. He let Dr Nord finish up and she was great. The only thing I wish I could have had was her placed on me immediately.
I started feeling super tired at this point, and Kevin followed ahead with Scout when the nurse came to grab him.
I got transferred to a bigger bed and wheeled to my after delivery room where Kevin and Scout were waiting, I LOVED seeing Kevin with a brand new baby! Just holding her and being in the same room as her was so special. Both Kevin and I have expressed that multiple times now. It feels so rare, and we are so grateful and happy🙏🏼🤎✨
And then I literally couldn’t keep my eyes open for everything that came next. The nurse was talking to me but I was nodding off. I had been holding Scout, but had Kevin take her. I fell asleep so happy and so relieved. The sacredness and blessings of that moment are something I will hold tight to my heart forever. I remember waking up and being able to look over at her sleeping in her little clear plastic hospital bed and not believing it. Not believing how she was just breathing on her own so well...not needing a million little tubes all over her body. I remember holding her and singing to her and just trying to savor every single moment in that room just her and me. Kevin had gone home to be with the other kids at night.
Okay I lied. The other thing I really wish I would have done is get a family pic around the hospital bed when the kids finally got to come see her for the first time. We didn't get one dangit! But here are some other pretty cute ones. I have way more videos I need to do something with...
Ryder has been the wild card from the beginning (no surprise there) so it came as no shock to us that he was unphased by this new little addition. He actually didn't care much for her except for this initial visit. It hasn't been up until the past month (she's FIVE months today!!) that he's really started being so sweet with her and giving her kisses!
Kevin's parents were able to come visit and meet her, as well as Bird who I somehow don't have a picture of!
My parent's were able to drive up from Utah and be with the older kids so Kevin could have some more study time as well as just be with me at the hospital.
And I think it goes without saying (although yep i sure am going to write more about it) that Tinley is over the moon elated that she has a sister earthside here with her! Tinley has been the most helpful and sweetest big sis to Scout. It has been one of the coolest things to witness actually-the sibling bond that has happened between Scout and each kid. It's been really cool to see how the bigger age gap has been. Highly recommend! haha it really has been a breeze...which I know sounds annoying to anyone at any phase in life. I NEVER thought I'd get to have another baby, let alone a healthy happy one!! That reality will never be lost on me...Having Scout has been so healing. I am so grateful.
Enjoy some more sweet pics of this sweet baby!
First bath at home!
My MIL made this GORGEOUS baby quilt for her and it is the most precious thing!
Is it bad that I keep thinking: Maybe one more?! All week I've thought that! hahaha ugh she's the cuddliest and sweetest little love.
(if you're wondering if I miss the inside and outdoor track on campus, i do)
And just like that she's already 5 months old. I'll have to do another big update at her 6 month mark. But so far she can roll from back to tummy, almost sit up by herself, likes to coo and make noises and get any attention she can. The only time she starts crying or fussing is if I can't get her bottle to her fast enough. We love her to pieces and are so thankful she gets to be a part of our family!
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