Me? A Baby Momma?

Uh, no.

I am not announcing anything right now.

(dangit, right?)

People on both sides of our families have noted that we don't have any chillin's of our own yet,

and I would like to talk about this subject of babies.

(I will even throw in some pictures to make it not so boring. woot!)

I would like to stop here and remind you that these are completely my thoughts and opinions,

and I don't mean to offend anyone whatsoever by sharing them.

And if I do...well then, I hope you can forgive me.

It's true.

The husband and I have been married 2 years, 8 months, and 1 day.

And we have 0 kids.

Oh the question of why.

Back in the day when I religiously attended the abs class on campus, I saw a familiar face from high school and started chatting.

She was actually a friend of my brother's, but I like to call his friends my friends

(and hopefully they think the same of me).

As we layed out our blue yoga mats our conversation went something like this:

friend - "I heard you got married! Congratulations!"

me - "Thanks!"

friend - "So how long have you been married?"

me - "About a year and a half."

friend - "Wow! That's crazy! Any kids?"

me - "Uh, (little laugh) not yet."

friend - "I can't believe you've been married that long and DON'T have any kids."

me - "Yea, but I'm okay with it. He's still in school and I'm working..."

friend - "But you know that one commandment to 'multiply and replenish the earth'?"

Oh NO you DI'INT just pull that card on me.

I am going to use the "H" word here, so please excuse my language.

But MAN, do I HATE living in this college community where, if you don't pop out a baby within 10 months of being married you are considered:

weird, infertile, or heaven forbid "going against church standards".

Really?

Can't I just have some time with my hubby before I give up my life to my children?

I'm not saying my life will be "over" when I have kids, but c'mon, it's definitely not the same.

We've loved getting to know each other the past couple years, and to be quite frank,

both of us have had a lot of growing up to do.

How can we handle a kid when we still feel like kids ourselves?

Don't answer that.

Or do, and leave me a comment about it.

I will admit I didn't always have this state of mind.

Being the oldest, I often got told to "stop being a mother hen!"

Growing up I always fantasized about getting married, and having a baby.

That's just how it went.

Baby this, baby that.

And for a short 2 months after Kevin and I got married that's what I was like (torture in a way).

HA.

It didn't help that we were out selling alarms with, like, 20 other couples that all seemed to have "just had" a baby. And every single one was stinkin' cute.

But as time went on and I re-evaluated myself (and had lots of heated debates discussions with Kevin on the subject), my mind gradually took on a better outlook for our situation.

I can honestly say that I'm totally scared out of my mind to have a baby.

Thoughts start flooding in like how do I survive labor? what if the baby is allergic to something? what if he/she is a thumb-sucker? what's the best way to potty train? how in the heck do I deal with a teenager? what if they do drugs? Seriously. How can I even come close to raising a child as good as my parents raised me?

And I feel like they did a superb job.

In all seriousness, yes, I am scared of getting fat and having all those sweet hormones of mine go bazerk.

Zits, puffy face, swollen feet, uncontrollable emotions, and throwing up?

No thank you.

Lucky for me I have an awesome mom who I can talk to about all this stuff, and she always reminds me that there is a beauty that comes from bringing a child into the world, which makes all those things up there seem insignificant.

I know I'm just going to have to swallow my pride and deal with them when the time comes.

And hey, I'm not totally heartless.

Every single time I hear that some one's prego (whether a close friend, or a friend of a friend)

I always always get a stab of jealously and wish that it was me announcing the exciting news.

Someday, my friends. Someday.

For now I will enjoy this time with the hubs and savor the attention he gives me.

..........

For the Record.

Now that I'm kind of off my soap box I need to add these little tid-bits in.

• I want my kids all about 2 years apart.
• Kevin is excellent with children.
• He has expressed numerous times how fun it will be to have our own kids someday.
• I used to want 6 or 7 kids total, but the more scared I get, the more that number diminishes
• (right now it's at a total of 5).
• Kevin wants 10 kids.
• If I get lucky, by 2012 we might be parents (but please don't hold your breath).